Charlie · Christmas · love · parenting

5 Ways to Give Presence this Christmas

My daughter, Charlie, came home from Santa’s Workshop last week, and showed me a few items she bought for our family members. She was excited about them, however, one gift seemed to make her sad.

“Why are you sad?” I asked.

She said, “I just don’t think this is good enough.”

I let that sit with me for a moment.

I totally understood what she meant. I allowed for my own feelings of lack come to the surface, and shared them with her.

“There were just so many things to choose…” she went on.

“It felt right when you bought it, but now that you brought it home, it doesn’t feel like it’s enough?” I asked her.

She nodded.

“You know, I have noticed this for myself. Giving gifts is a way we show love to others and tell them how much we appreciate them. The more I think about it, it is easy to feel like a gift we get them isn’t enough. We love them so much and we appreciate them so much, it’s easy to feel like whatever we give them just doesn’t communicate how much we love them and how special they are.”

She nodded.

I realized that often times I find myself searching in stores and scrolling online for the “perfect” gifts, when my frustration and anxiousness possibly stems from not being able to find something that clearly speaks how much I love and care about the person.

And why would it?!

Charlie and I both agreed that gifts are one way we can share our love, but certainly not the more articulate…or even, best way. (We did decide to give this particular gift to another family member and that felt much better and got big smiles from Charlie.)

Here are some ways we decided that we can give presence this year, which is what we really want to give and receive ourselves.

1.) Write a note, card or just tell the person how much you love them. This can feel out of our comfort zones sometimes, but it can also feel just right. Even something as small as a few sentences can say what it is you mean.

2.) Sing Christmas carols with those you love. We know listening to music and singing is a great way to raise your vibration. Listening to Christmas music can bring us back to a state of peace and freedom. If you have kids to sing Christmas music with, do it. It will be something they remember and cherish and it’s setting the foundation for a lifetime of warmth and spirit.
3.) Be curious. We know it’s beneficial to ask our little kids questions, but maybe ask one more than you normally would. Move through the general questions and keep asking until the conversation gets really interesting. They may not know the answer, but they’ll certainly think of something to say. As for our own family’s traditions, learn more about how things were done in the past. Watch old home movies and get a sense of those who have paved your way. After watching a few old movies that my mom so awesomely converted to DVD, I remember that I come from a long line of love and family. This strengthens a loving relationship with myself and the family that I have created.
Truly watching home movies of Baby Mama opening Christmas presents with Grandma Adams and Aunt Maria
4.) Pray or meditate. This is giving the gift of presence to yourself, as well as to God. Prayer is something we all do daily, but giving yourself these moments of your own presence, is true self-love. It has a ripple effect that is felt in all areas of our lives. It allows us space to attract that which is of the highest service to ourselves and others. It’s the gift that puts all consumerism out of business…. through prayer and meditation, we slowly transform our relationship with material items…and awaken to the power and truth within us.
5.) Forget it’s Christmas for a minute…
I swear I was so in the moment of being with my kids that it wasn’t until I got into the car and heard Christmas music that I literally thought ‘oh, it’s so nice to hear Christmas music…it’s Christmas time!’
I know this probably comes off as strange.  But with a little over a week left until the holiday and pretty much nothing done, I forgot what regular life was like before I was consumed with what I still needed to do
It’s like this with everything. As soon as Christmas is over, I will be thinking about Truly’s first birthday…and then Charlie’s 8th birthday…and my Lord, if I keep having kids it’ll be one thing after the next until I don’t know when!
Sometimes I think it’s cool to just sit and let the holidays and their expectations fizzle away…and feel what it’s like to have nothing to do…no where to go… let the gratitude bubble over…let the present boil within…and just be.
5.5) Soak up the Christmas spirit. After realizing that I basically told you to forget it’s Christmas, I realized just how awesome it is to roll all our miracles into a momentum of Christmas spirit. In the world of manifesting and prayer, throw a little Christmas spirit in there for good measure and we pretty much have it nailed.
For more on giving presence, watch #givepresence here
Also, check out Finding Joy’s 25 Things I Want My Kids to Know About Christmas.


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