A shadow worker is one who participates in the work done to uncover the shadow.
The shadow is the part of ourselves that we have disconnected from.
Why the shadow is important
It holds our healing.
By healing, I mean our wholeness.
When we feel whole, we feel love.
When we feel whole, we have more to give to others.
When we feel whole, we see the world through a lens of compassion, and we see others with more compassion and love.
Thus, we feel better.
We feel joy fully.
We feel peace more often.
We feel fulfillment.
We don’t feel the need to strive or to run from something.
That thing being ourselves.
We are content with ourselves.
We love ourselves.
And we can be the love that the world needs.
Wi
How can we recognize our shadow?
We can begin noticing our shadow when we point the finger at others.
The traits we see in others that we don’t like, we can trace back to our own selves.
These disowned parts of ourselves make up our shadow selves.
What to know about our shadow
- It’s a part of us that we subconsciously labeled as bad and we no longer identify with it on a conscious level.
- At one point in our upbringing, it was no longer safe or accepted to have an emotion or belief, and so we pushed it away so we would be love and accepted.
- It will exist until we re-integrate it… until we invite it back into our conscious minds, with love and acceptance.
- Although painful and at times terrifying, the re-integration of our shadow will allow us to feel complete, safe and loved.
- The shadow self could also consist of positive qualities that were better left out in order to maintain our status growing up.
This is a very humbling experience. It’s not easy work to go within ourselves and hold ourselves accountable for things we done or ways we have acted.
The saying goes ‘forgiveness is for ourselves, not for the other person.’
When we let the negative feelings within us dwell, we remain imprisoned by them.
We are giving ourselves the relief and the peace we deserve when we let ourselves be free.
Be free to feel.
Be free to be ourselves.
All of ourselves.
Not just the parts of us that we think are acceptable to others.
And then once we let ourselves off the hook, for all the errors we have made, we are free to be free.
Diagnosis during pregnancy 
It’s incredible how difficult it is for us to see our shadow selves. We despise those traits so much that to admit they come from us seems impossible. When we realize first that forgiveness if for ourselves – and beyond that, recognize the liberation forgiving ourselves causes – self-care becomes more second nature, doesn’t it?
Yes! I am working on this every day… it’s nice when I can recognize my perceived faults as being part of the whole, and I can forgive, love and integrate. It’s all good!
Beautiful work. I included your post in my weekend roundup of good reads:
https://coachdaddyblog.wordpress.com/2017/09/02/weekend-reads-ii-partnership-peace-and-parenthood/
Hi Nikki,
I found your post fascinating, and something I am going to have to really think about. What you said really resonated with me, Thank you for sharing.
💖💖💖🌟🙌
I like this concept of the shadow self. I’ve long suspected that the things that drive us crazy about others are the very things that we don’t like about ourselves, but I’ve never heard it explained before the way you have here. Accepting all parts of our self is important when we are in relationships with others. It’s the old “you can’t love another if you don’t love yourself” lesson. It’s a life-long practice as we change and grow, and not easy at all! Especially when others in our lives are changing and growing at their own pace. Thanks for giving me something to think about!